electron surfing (expand)

July 26, 2009

blood flows
from an innocent

lifeless as a bag of shells

the one who seeks worship
is the antihero

the flicker of campfire
now the flicker of screen

6 Responses to “electron surfing (expand)”

  1. Narendra Says:

    the one
    who seeks worship
    is the antihero

    i somehow like these lines very much..nice poem…

  2. qazse Says:

    thank you, i was not sure if it would work for anyone other than myself.

  3. pauline Says:

    those last two lines kick!

  4. qazse Says:

    Thank you. When camping I am mesmerized by the ever changing flame. I sometimes think the human fascination with flame is at the base of society’s fascination with electronica.

  5. howard Says:

    let me say that some of my favorite poems are the ones that feel like they rhyme — even though they may not actually rhyme.

    i read this, and got that impression, and then spent a few minutes looking back over it, trying to figure out why is seemed that way. it resonates well.

  6. qazse Says:

    Hi Howard! Thank you for the compliment. I can see some rhyme-age in the first two stanzas. I am presently looking at the last two and wonder if the use (or overuse?) of the word “the” creates that sense of balance.

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